Fantasies And The Reality Of Marriage

When I was about ten years old, I was fascinated by the whole idea of getting married. It seemed so magical, so exciting, to get all dressed up, wear intricately embroidered clothes, lots of jewellery, and look your best. Look your best for that one day. That would be your day. Each time we attended a wedding, if the bride wasn't already on the stage, I would pester my mother to take me to her. So that I could take a good look at the bride. I loved doing that. It looked like a lot of fun. I was into sketching at the time, and brides decked up in all their finery were one of my favourite subjects for my artwork.

Real life is so different from a little girl's fantasy land.

Getting married is not just about dressing up. As a matter of fact, for myself and for a few close friends I know, the dressing up was actually a bit of a hassle that we had to do because our families expected us to do it. If I had the choice, I would wear something a lot simpler, something which did not weigh close to a ton.

When you get married, you have to figure out if you're actually marrying the right person. Now, depending on how adaptable or how flexible you are, there may be more than one right person for you. Even so, it is not easy to pick him out of a line-up. You have to know what areas you absolutely have to agree on, and what you can compromise on. Deciding whom to marry is tough, but it's not the only tough thing you have to do. It is, however, probably the single most important decision that you'll take in your life.

Then there are all the ceremonies to plan. This is tricky as well. You have a large number of family members on either side, and everyone has their own ideas. You can't please everyone, but you also cannot afford to offend anyone. And you also want to do things your way.

Planning a wedding and then actually living with the person you married is not always smooth sailing. You have to make a serious effort to make things work. But you know what? It is also a lot of fun. It is also what gives you a good reason to live, a reason you never could have imagined before.