The Great Thing About Window Shopping...

...is that it's one of the few things that I know of that can help me relax and that do not involve spending any money or adding on any calories to the day's tally. Sometimes, exercise does all that too, but it's not something I would really want to do towards the end of a tiring day, which is when you really need to relax. I've discovered that, if I'm at home, listening to music or reading, and there's food that's readily accessible, I'll want to stop what I'm doing and eat. I know, I think about food a lot. But that's just who I am. But if I am in the middle of a huge store browsing through clothes or shoes or books, I feel a certain amount of laziness when I think about going to the mall's food court or the bookstore's cafe. That is the good kind of laziness. And that's why I love window shopping.

Out Shopping

After a really long time, I went shopping today because I wanted to, not because I needed to. I wanted to buy myself a dress. Because I've wanted to wear dresses for a long time, but I kinda felt that they didn't look good on me when I was rather pudgy.

Now, having shed at least fifty pounds and four dress sizes in the last three years, I am in the mood to wear dresses as often as I can. Of course, the warm weather here is very short lived, but, as they say, make hay while the sun shines.

But guess what? I didn't find anything I wanted to buy. I don't want to wear the kind of dresses that American women wear so often - halters or spaghetti straps or 33 inch lengths (that's too short for my liking). I did, however, find a few that had none of these disqualifications and also appealed to me otherwise - in terms of fabric, print and fit. Well, almost fit. I didn't find the correct size in any of those. But you know what the great thing is? All the sizes were too large for me. I could fit into the smallest sizes for a few styles that I tried on, just to see if what size would fit me correctly. Now, of course, the smallest size in an American clothing store is not the same as the smallest size in an Indian one, but this is still a big, huge deal for me.

So I'm happy today. Even though I didn't buy anything after a three hour shopping trip. So what's the problem? How do I celebrate? I don't celebrate this kind of success by eating something special. Shopping for something nice to wear was the only way I knew!

Shopping Away

Before I came to the States, I knew what Thanksgiving was all about, and I knew that they have crazy “Black Friday” sales the day after. I knew that people camp outside stores in the night so that they can be first in line. But I didn’t know just how crazy it all gets.

The stores open at about four in the morning for shoppers. (Toys ‘R’ Us actually opened at midnight this Black Friday.) And there are already hundreds of people queued outside, waiting for the doors to open. There’s no parking, the place outside the stores are all lined with Dunkin’ Donuts cups, and people are just crazy. Apparently one of the salespeople who opened the doors to a Wal-Mart died in a stampede last year. Now they have special training for people who open the doors.

By six in the morning, most of the good deals are gone, but people are still trying to find parking spots and waiting for hours in the checkout queues for most of the day. There’s also a “Cyber Monday” sale in most of the larger stores, where they have great online deals for a day. That’s what I’m restricting my shopping to!

Random Things I Learnt About Myself

Since I am spending a lot of time by myself these days, there are some things that I have discovered (or re-discovered) about myself in recent times.

• I should always have easy access to a variety of fruit, so that I can take good care of my random binges throughout the day, instead of giving in to the temptation for chocolate and all things chocolaty. We keep very limited amounts of such things around the house, but we make sure we have lots of fresh fruit and vegetables, and beans.
• I am so much happier when I am well rested. Since I am getting enough sleep these days, I am feeling so much less irritable and cranky. I'm sure it also has to do with the fact that I am not working and hence am under a lot less stress, but this is a major factor.
• There is such a thing as too much shopping, even for a girl like me. These days, my husband feels like taking me out to shop, but I simply don't feel like it. After all the wedding shopping, I am a little tired of walking in and out of trial rooms or figuring out which earrings will look good on me.
• Though I don't mind chicken and fish and stuff, I am generally happier eating vegetarian food. I can't seem to be able to enjoy meat for more than two or three consecutive meals. I'd rather live on just watermelons and lettuce, and maybe a sprouts salad thrown in for good measure.
• I like being by myself. A lot.
• I love sleeping.
• I love long, warm showers in cool weather and cool ones in warm weather.

Thoughts For Today

I never knew that I could actually get sick and tired of shopping. It's one thing to revamp your entire wardrobe, but it's a different thing if you have to buy more clothes than you actually need, just because there's a tradition of carrying a certain number of items in your trousseau. That had me a little tired. Of trying on all kinds of clothes and all kinds of shoes. So I'm pretty thankful that I was all done with it today. This leaves only the jewelery that still needs to be shopped for.

There are so many things I like about India, but there are a whole bunch of them that make me feel thankful that I'm leaving the country. Why do we let pandits take us for a ride for their own profit? Why do we let every uncle and aunt execute their own whims and fancies at an event which is supposed to be our special day?

Well... but I guess it's not that big a deal, really. Two years from now, I'll still know that I found a great guy. But I won't remember all these little irritating nuances.

Feeling Like A Princess

So I went out with my soon to be in-laws to shop for some wedding jewellery today. I haven't really done or witnessed anything like it before. Trying on all those bangles and necklaces and my in-laws mentioning that some of it looks like it is from Jodhaa Akbar made me feel like a princess. I must say that they were really sweet to me. It felt good, since this was the first time I actually spent such a significant amount of time with them. I think we all had a pretty good time today.

By the way, trying on a mangalsutra to see how it looks on you is quite an experience. It really does something to you.

Changes

Things that are changing with each passing day, as my wedding day approaches.

• I like songs like Genda Phool, Paayaliya and Jahan Piya more than ever before.
• The cellphone that needed to be charged once in two days now needs charging twice a day.
• I am trying to grow my fingernails. That is a big, huge deal for me. This requires more willpower than resiting a chocolate chip cookie that's right in front of me.
• I go out shopping both days, every weekend, and feel terrific about spending all my money at the speed of light.

Will keep adding to the list as things occur to me.

Shopaholism Revisited

There's this e-mail that has done the rounds any number of times, which talks about the differences between men and women. One of the things it says is that a man will pay two bucks for an item worth one buck that he needs. A woman, on the other hand, will pay one buck for a something worth two that she doesn't need, but it's on sale.

Well, that's not exactly what we do. What we do is, we plan a shopping trip when we hear that there's a sale on at our favourite store. Then we go through all the sale items and don't find anything we like. Eventually we pick something that's really nice, but it's not on sale. We don't pay a rupee for a two rupee item. We pay the two rupees. Now we don't need this two rupee item either. It's just that we came out here to shop. And shop we will. Because it makes us feel good. Makes us feel nice and pretty. And that's really important in our world, you know.

Those who've seen How I Met Your Mother will recall how Lily, one of the female protagonists on the show, accumulates an insane amount of credit card debt by shopping for designer clothes and shoes every time she's upset about something. That's a slightly extreme version of what we all do. Today I bought some stuff that I'd actually been eyeing for a while but deemed too expensive. Today I got it at half price. Now because it was half price, I bought a little more than what I needed. And that, my dear readers, made me feel awesome.

By the way, interesting little write up on Wikipedia about the more extreme form of compulsive shopping. Did you know it's called oniomania? I didn't. Quite possibly, Alok did, going by his comment on my earlier blog entry on this subject.

Shopaholics Anonymous

I've never been able to understand why shopping gives me a high. This is true for almost all the women I know. Blowing away our hard-earned money leaves us with a feeling that's almost intoxicating for most of us. I mean, there is science behind the way dark chocolate makes us feel, and the way beer makes men feel, but what really is the deal with going out and buying yourself clothes when you already have an overcrowded wardrobe full of so much stuff that you actually tend to forget about some of the stuff you own? Or in my case, finding at least two sets of accessories to go with every outfit, or even finding a pair of earrings that doesn't go with anything that I have, and then finding something to wear them with!!! Looking for and trying on clothes that make us look good is more appealing to our aesthetic sense (and some other senses as well, I suspect) than going for a tour to, say, the Mughal Gardens. I've never been there, by the way. Never found enough motivation to do that. It's also a better way of spending time with friends than going out to eat, because you save on some extra calories :P. It's also more effective at bringing me out of a bad mood than the most sinful, chocolatey dessert. I'm a huge chocoholic too, by the way.

And it's not necessarily true only for women. After hearing Rahul Bose's tips on getting over a breakup in Pyaar Ke Side Effects, and after a recent shopping trip and related discussions with an old friend of mine, I've started thinking that it's also true for at least some men.

I know I am not going anywhere with this. I said it was going to be random. Just looking out to see if someone out there has a logical explanation on why it is so much fun and so uplifting to go out, lighten your wallet, and find stuff for a wardrobe that has no more room in it anyway. Maybe I need a larger wardrobe. On my next shopping trip I should probably head for a furniture store.