Saturday, May 31, 2008

Forgive and Forget

"To err is human; to forgive, divine."

Very well said. Forgiveness is a wonderful thing. Not so much for the one who is being forgiven as for the one who forgives. When you hold a grudge against someone, without realising it, you give that person the power to control some part of your life. Because every time you think about all the stuff that makes you feel angry, you do something or the other that is counter productive to your well being. It's like there are chains in your heart, tying you down, preventing you from feeling all the happiness that you can feel, preventing you from enjoying everything around you that you can enjoy. It prevents you from spreading your wings and flying as high as you can.

There was this article that I read a long time back. It expressed this interesting idea where the author said that, if someone takes something from you and doesn't return it, you should give that thing to that person as a Christmas present and free yourself from holding a grudge. It doesn't matter if you hated that person to begin with and would never give them a Christmas present under ordinary circumstances. You can still give them such a present, which is, really, a huge gift that you are giving yourself. The author of this article was talking about tangible gifts, but I think it would be a great thing to do for intangible objects as well. When someone takes away a part of your heart, of your soul, give it to that person as a gift. When someone takes up a lot of your time and later on, you feel that it was time well wasted, give them that time as a present. Hanging on to the regret that comes because of the wasted time drains you emotionally. Clutching the hard feelings that arise when a friend betrays your trust prevents you from trusting another friend fully. So let go, and once you do, remember not to let the negative vibes enter your mind again. I found the following quote interesting. It's a little specific, but the message it carries can be generalized:

"Once a woman has forgiven her man, she must not reheat his sins for breakfast."

2 comments:

abhgupta said...

That's a really ;) quote to sum up the post...! :D

Kavita said...

Hey girl... this is great!! Never knew you had such a talent for wording your feelings :)

I think this attitude to thinking you have gifted someone something is quite nice :) even though, I also think that while you may forgive, its much much harder, if not impossible, to forget...